About Me

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About Me 2017-09-18T17:05:56+00:00

It’s Whitney, bitch.

First off, I’m really not super qualified for this.

I graduated from a state college a few years back with a degree in marketing. Judge as you will, but I did it without completely destroying my liver. And I did it without a job lined up after graduation.

After riding on the struggle bus for an eternity, I learned a lot of tricks and eventually, I accepted a position working as a full-time marketing consultant, so I’ve become pretty good at giving people great advice that they choose to ignore anyway.

But hey, they pay me, and I need it to afford a better life for my pooch, Atlas, who is the sweetest pupper in the world. Fight me on this, I dare you.

Way too often, I get ready to search for something online, and I’m bombarded by all these fancy dog moms or human moms or just humans (why it’s never just dogs, I’ll never know) with questions or snarky messages. Sorry, I didn’t know seasoning a cast iron skillet was a thing. I didn’t grow up with Laura Ingalls Wilder.

They also tell me that there actually is a correct way to fold a fitted sheet — Spoiler alert, it’s a lie. Just wad it up or put it on your bed like the rest of us.

I dream of a world where I can search for a recipe, workout plan, or anything really with instructions that I can understand and relate to. Like, where does the recipe say I can substitute fancy schmancy cheeses for good ol’ Kroger brand? Or in the workout plan, does it say how long I have to exercise to burn off that cheat day meal? (Who are we kidding, at this point, it’s more of a cheat month.)

That’s where I come in.

We all know it’s no easy feat– growing up. And no one is perfect, despite what their Facebook posts may portray. I’ve been learning to handle this adulting thing bit by bit, and I’m here to shed some light on how you can, too. As long as we’re still kickin’, we’re making progress, buddy.

I started this blog to show others that the struggle bus is a stinky, but entertaining ride. And eventually, you’ll still get to the same destination, except with some really funny stories along the way.

Come away with me on the magic struggle bus! Let’s learn this shit together.

Biggest accomplishments to date

  • I didn’t burn the apartment down today.

  • Successfully crawled out of bed after only snoozing two of my alarms

  • Finished 80% of my work at the office

  • Didn’t lose my shit on Gam-Gam driving the minivan in traffic

  • Remembered to switch the laundry over

Subscribe to read about what shenanigans I’ll get into this month!
(It may be more than just hanging out with Atlas and Michael Scott.)

I will only send you valuable information, so don’t worry about your inbox getting crazy stuffed. I understand that struggle on a personal level.

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